"They are gonna rip up your heads, your aspirations to shreds"

I apologise for the long pause since my 30th birthday.  I've had lots to sort out as well as feeling old and fighting flu : s

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Today I had a rather unexpected invite - it was to a college reunion.  Now for someone that did not enjoy education until university asides from extra curricular, the sight of a reunion invite is not overly welcome.  Don't get me wrong, it's nice to be thought of, but I don't want to go, lol.  Luckily for this particular one, I'm busy with work, which is a perfect cover for my real feelings.

College and secondary were always a tie on which one was worse.  I was bullied halfway through secondary (which was a really difficult time) but at college, it was more the fact of seeing other people taking it tough from class mates - overall, not good.

Some people's college years were really happy, but mine was just another reason to dream about being an adult and going to work - something I'd always quite wanted to do, as I'd been reasonably mature from a young age.  

My biggest problem with college was that in some cases our teachers were worse than the pupils.  Several of the teaching staff not only stood by the bullies of our class, but also constantly told me what I should be doing with my life (move out of home - even though I was 17 with no money, go to university).  I suppose I should be glad they weren't telling me to get laid, but who knows what they would have said if I'd stayed another year. 

The problem with college was I was doing a Performing Arts course with people that mainly didn't love the arts in the way I did.  I wasn't doing it for fame or money, I was doing it for the passion I had had for it since I was young and couldn't imagine doing anything else.  There were several of my class who were serious about it (several who I am still in contact with now) but unfortunately we were mainly over ruled by the ones that weren't.  Although acting was my third strain of interest, I actually enjoyed drama, I just felt I wasn't supported by my class at college and just lost more and more interest as the course went on.  I also had the fact that I was still doing weekend stage school where I liked most the people and was enjoying the practical sessions much more than college.  We also got to perform in professional theatres, which was much nicer than a "drama hall" with curtains and massive cotton reels (imagine that it's Willy Wonka's Factory, lol) and gave us better experience of the theatrical world.

The thing is reunions are great for the showoffs and the people with the great memories, but for so many people, the past wasn't so bright and the present is what they are enjoying now - who wants to go backwards?  Besides, I'm not the person I was at college and I'm quite glad.  It was the start of my adult journey where I was getting to grips with who I wanted to be and not enough mistakes had been made til after this time - I like the person I am now a lot more.

So I hope my class have a great night, remembering all the things I like to forget, but I'll be working with the stars that night baby and for once, I wouldn't change it for the world : )


Blog title inspired by: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k6EQAOmJrbw

"I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad..."

So I just came back from Latitude Music Festival and I had such a great time : )


I've been to Latitude a few years back but worked on behalf of Gorillas.org (and Beer Workers Co.) on the bar.  This year I was Stage Managing a show for Theatre 503 (at the Theatre Space) called Billy Chicken's Is A Psychopath Superstar.


First of all, I had a pass that allowed me into more areas : ) this included us being able to pitch our tents in the performers area and using the nice facilities : )  The amount of famous people I saw wandering around this area over the weekend was insane - I even saw Marcus Brigstock getting into his funky 1950s caravan (it was awesome!)


Second of all, our tech and shows were on the Thursday and Friday, giving us Saturday and Sunday to do whatever we wanted at the festival - what isn't cool about that!


My duties also changed over the rehearsal period, so I landed up calling the show (cueing the lights and sound from the desk).  I was originally quite scared about this but it was so enjoyable to do (especially as I know the show inside out) and it was a really great confidence booster - I would DEFINITELY do it again!  On top of this it was for a 650 seater that was packed on both nights.  This is about the same size venue I work within but never having the power over the show - so cool : )


Other than work, I had about 3hrs sleep a night and got to do lots of cool things:
- saw Professor Brian Cox with Al Murrey and various other people talking about the connections between the arts and science
- Marcus Brigstock and Robin Ince on the early Edition for Radio 4
- Tim Key
- Elbow (the best performance of the weekend)
- Rufus Wainwright and his band
- Guilty Pleasures (will definitely have to go to this club night more often)
- Lots of dancing in the rain In The Woods to Dermot O'Leary's DJing
- Mark Ravenhill and a guy from the RSC talking about the connections between theatre and religion and how they can both be controlled by government and sponsorship at times
- Johonny Woo (hilarious performance artist who dresses up including singing a song dressed as Mary Portas, lol)
- Mark Grist (the English Teacher known for out rapping his hiphop pupil on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tp4wEewrQdU - so talented!)
- Look Left, Look Right's 4 Musicals
- Disco Shed
- Dexys (Originally Dexy's Midnight Runners - Come On Eileen : p)


If you get a chance to go, you should.  The Festival has a bit of everything art based for everyone - you won't be disappointed : )


I also want to thank Theatre 503 company and cast and all the other wonderful people I met, ate, drank and danced with - what a great weekend!

Blog title comes from this:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3gFGu9yF34

"22 grand job, in the city it's alright..."

I just got in from a lovely meal with my mate Verrall to find out I have a 2nd interview for a job I want.  I was so happy and shocked (because the jobs I  really want don't ever seem to come to fruition) that I nearly cried on the train - embarrassing!


I'll explain.  I have worked in the Arts for over 10 years now (with a few mini gaps here and there) and sometimes I still feel back at step 1.  The problem is because I have never been one for long term goals (mainly because I like variety in my work and haven't had that one thing I've really wanted, more like 10, lol), freelance work tended to suit me in the past.  It was great  because I could do lots of different jobs, work with different companies, have no problem getting time to myself (just didn't book work when I wanted to be off) and got to party and socialise around the lifestyle.  The problem is that freelance work also means being poor at certain points in the year (if the works not there), constantly looking for work and never being able to plan more than a few months ahead in worry that important well paid work would come up.


In the last couple of years my ideas of work have changed.  I've spent ages doing heavy duty stuff, long irregular hours and working for low wages - I want a decent wage and lifestyle because I'm 29!  There's nothing wrong with that!


The thing is I've done so many applications and interviews now I'm confused what skills and tactics are the magic to getting a job.  I have so much to offer yet I don't know what to do to get paid for it - arrrrrggggghhhh!!!!  Recently I have become more creative in my applications by having faint background pictures on my CV, designing stylish borders and my newest thing, the video CV.  For someone like me where my skills partially come from practical skills/experience I need evidence not a plain piece of paper to prove my worth.  It also comes in handy that I do sound and video editing, as I did this myself (the music was even two tracks I had merged on my own home equipment - creative is what I was going for : p).


The problem is, for every 20 applications you send out, you are lucky if you even get one email back - people are getting so awful at even emailing you to say you've been unsuccessful (I HATE rude people!)  I've interviewed people for internships and we always got back to them, even if we weren't able to use them:  It's courteous and it is not difficult!


The worse thing is it doesn't get any easier the older you get and that is VERY annoying!  I would have thought nearly 14 years on since applying for my first job I would be ready for what ever interviewees throw at me but all that has happened is I have become slightly more confident in the process and maybe I care less (the more you worry the worse the interview normally goes) as it's easier that way.


All I will say to all of you who are looking for work is persevere til you succeed!  I have experienced a whole roller coaster of emotions over the last five years but I feel I am finally nearer to what I am looking for and I am not willing to give up.  I have faith in you all - find your dreams and don't let the recession get in your way!

If you haven't noticed by now, all my posts have lyrics or titles from songs (will go back and update all the posts so they have links to any songs where possible at the end of the post). This is because I like using famous lyrics creatively and due to my love of music, know a ton of songs from different genres and eras.   Today's title comes from the great track by The Rakes's  22 Grand Job - have a gander! :


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=flESd2vFXy4